Jingle is on a date or something with Darek. Derek is wearing dumber sunglasses than usual.
Derek: We need to talk, babe.

Derek: I’ve been working on being more hot, and I think it’s only fair that you should have to work on your appearance too.

Jingle: What?? You said I was a six! And that you have really high standards, so your idea of a six is actually really good!
Derek: You are. But you’ve been stagnating while I’ve been looksmaxing. I’m now a seven, and I should be dating a seven. That seven could be you.

Derek: I suggest a hair degreaser, or whatever the name is for the women’s product that degreases hair.

Jingle: Shampoo?

Derek: Perhaps.


In a series of small circular panels we see Jingle fuming and Derek looking obliviously pleased with himself.

Jingle: What makes you so much hotter than before? You don’t look any different to me!
Derek: Oh contraire.

Derek: My old sunglasses were shaped like “prey eyes.” I’ve replaced them with these ones that are shaped like “hunter eyes.”

Jingle: Fine. I’ll get new sunglasses too. We’re even.
Derek: I’m also wearing this shirt with a capital T on it. This creates the illusion of broader shoulders.

Jingle: Is that all it takes to go from a six to a seven?
Derek: Plus I’ve been doing “mewing” exercises to strengthen my jaw. And getting results.

Jingle: No you haven’t! You look the same! Your jaw looks exactly the same!


Derek: Oh yeah?

Derek picks up the whole table they’re sitting at

Derek takes a big bite out of the table

Derek looks at Jingle smugly.